Monday, March 28, 2011
The Single Stupidest Thing I've Ever Done
Wow. Long day. I am begging, BEGGING, that someone call or text me or comment on this and offer some reassurance that this has happened to them before. So, I get to study hall to begin the 18 hours and 6 minutes of study time I have left before the Econ test to end all econ tests. I know I put a pen in my pocket when I left the room, but somehow it has vanished when I sit down to start working. I spend the next five minutes scrambling through my backpack looking for an extra to no avail. I ask the football player next to me if he has one (obviously he doesn't, I don't think football players do homework anyways). Then I ask the two sailors sitting across from me. No mas. I spend a few minutes pondering asking the study monitor if I can borrow her pen, knowing full well she's going to sass me for not bringing a pen to do homework. Maybe I can just do two hours of homework without writing? No can do, it needs to be done. I sack up and approach the desk to ask for a pen.
Me: I lost my pen. Do you have one that I could borrow please?
Study Hall Monitor: Uhmmm.... (slowly raises pointer finger upwards)
It's on my ear. Fuck me.
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Let me begin by saying you have no grasp of the Spanish language (or English for that matter, but I’ll get into that in a moment). “No mas”? That means “no more,” you dip shit. That doesn’t even make sense in English, let alone Spanish. I can get you wanting to use a phrase in Spanish to make your writing sound more colloquial (because your prose fucking sucks), but I’d advise at least knowing first what you were saying in Spanish before adding it to your lexicon (that means vocabulary).
ReplyDeleteNow, for the meat of this comment. Why the fuck does this qualify as a blog post? In a blog devoted to Boston College sports and other aspects of college life, who gives a shit about you forgetting you put your pen behind your ear? What, did you come across that video (which is not even remotely funny, by the way) and become inspired to relate some foregone anecdote of your life? Spare me. And it’s not even like your story is all that funny. In fact, it’s not funny at all. ¡Para nada! (That means “at all.”)
ReplyDeleteYou were in study hall, you needed to study for Econ, and you misplaced your pen. Shit, that’s happened to everybody! Everybody, at some point in their lives, has forgotten they’ve put something behind their ears or on their heads. Plus, if you had an “Econ test to end all Econ tests,” the least you could do is “sack up” and ask your teacher for a pen. And it’s not even your teacher, it’s a fucking study hall monitor! Christ, they’re like the guidance counselors of teachers! So forgetting you put a pen behind your ear was the “stupidest thing you’ve ever done?” Really? I have trouble believing that, especially since you decided to write for this blog.
ReplyDeletelooks like scenes has a fan
ReplyDelete